By B

Grade: A+

How can anyone not love HEART? What is up with all the haters? Even Henry would like them, I bet, because they are kind of like heavy metal. But he probably does not realize this. Henry aside, the reason you should all love HEART is because they satisfy very many thirsts. If you are in the mood for a heart-wrenching power ballad, lucky for you, because they have THESE DREAMS and WHAT ABOUT LOVE. If you are in the mood to hear some ladies really go insane, you are even luckier, because they have MAGIC MAN, BARRACUDA, and, of course, CRAZY ON YOU, which is one of the classic spaz-themed songs of all time. If you are in the mood for a skinny lady, well Heart certainly has one of those. And if you are up for a fat lady hiding behind an ivy-covered Grecian column, well, I’m not saying anything, but you might find that you enjoy Heart as well!!!

We went to see Heart at the Beacon Theater on Tuesday. Fuck, those ladies are amazing. There is nothing quite like watching a lady as old as my mom doing scissor kicks and throwing her hair around while playing the electric guitar! Cameron Crowe is a lucky man. Ann Wilson looked way skinnier than usual, but she shouldn’t have been wearing that weird flowy slip. It was obviously meant to conceal, but I think she would have looked better without it. Anyway, I’m not really into doing concert reviews. I think it is enough to say: You missed it! Better luck next time. I heart Heart.