Winning and losing some

Some water got in my phone and it died.  I’m not assigning blame here.  Maybe it was my fault for having such a crappy phone that a little water would cause it to offer up the blue screen of phone death.  Maybe it was someone else’s fault for putting condensation-oozing water bottles in the bag where the phone was.  Either way, it’s dead, which is why I didn’t call you/call you back.  Sorry! Send me an email with your phone number.

While I’m being peevish: today I was in the car with my cousin Kaylie, who’s in middle school, and her iPod was playing ‘I Kissed A Girl’ by Katy Perry.  I guess I am late to the party of hating on this, but in the entire world history of pseudo-lesbian pop things — Britney and Madonna’s VMA kiss, t.A.T.u., every sweeps-week episode of every desperate tv show featuring “a shocking kiss” that will shock absolutely no one who’s ever seen a sweeps-week episode of a desperate tv show before — it is by far the lamest.   It’s lame not just because it is a lame, lame, lame-ass song (“the taste of her cherry chapstick” — ok, so Katy is ripping off not only Jill Sobule but also Yo La Tengo), it is also lame because it makes me feel ancient that someone can have a hit song that has the exact same title and theme as a hit song from 1996 and no one will care because no one who’s listening to Katy Perry is old enough to remember 1996.  They probably weren’t even born in 1996.  One of the things that’s worst about how much faster pop culture is cannibalizing itself these days is how old it makes relatively young people feel.  Jill Sobule herself is pretty blase about the whole thing: “Maybe I’ll write a third ‘I Kissed a Girl’ for fun. It will be about how I kissed her, Ieft the dull boyfriend, got gay-married in California, and really no one gave a shit.”  Still, I can be mad on her behalf.

Katy Perry’s other single is called Ur So Gay and the chorus goes “You are so gay and you don’t even like boys.”  Whatever, Katy Perry: you are so gay and you don’t even like girls.  And by gay I mean retarded.

10 comments to Winning and losing some

  • MissJ

    Thank you!! Hell, I was only 11 in 1996, but I very vividly remember the ORIGINAL Jill Sobule song and the brightly colored music video. So when someone mentioned this song to me, I was like, “Oh, is it a cover of that song from the 90s?”

    So lame.

  • you forgot to mention janet ‘wardrobe malfunction’ jackson’s velvet rope in, what 2000? she was on some extra-pseudo bi-bullshit back then. oooh, yeah!! and jc chasez from nsync! remember when he went solo with ’some girls dance with women/tryin to get some attention’. i regret that i know that lyric, except that it’s just so freaking funny.

  • The girl Katy Perry kissed was in the mirror.

  • It’s also extra-lame because of the line, “it’s not what good girls do,” so it’s trying to capitalize on HOT GIRL ACTION while condemning it at the same time. Ick.

  • There’s so much songs that is lame and self-canabalizing. Is new trend for last 10 yers (or more even!!!) in all pop culture. Innovative is no good. Slick is thing to do. No need for culture/music to have soul that belongs to self. Must have leased plastic urban NEO soul like car with the rims and the hydraulics and the new car smell! Ha ha! Good times in America!!!1!!!

  • owapapercut

    Before you know it, it’ll be “Hey you kids! Get off my lawn!”

  • Phoebe

    I feel I have no choice to refer you to my friend Rebekah’s thoughts on the Horror of Katy Perry, espesh as Rebekah is my friend who first good all dreamy-eyed over you a year-plus ago and heckled me until I finally went back to reading Gawker as a result. Plus, it will make her SO MAD that I’m doing this. So, you know, I have to. (Also: So many points for calling Katy Perry out for Yo La Tengo rip-off.)

    Plus I’m unabashedly plugging my youngest brother’s comment down below her post (and my own comments).

    Love the recent ubiquity of your posts, Emily!

  • Meh. The only time I’d actually heard this song was as a tinny audio leak from my 14-yr old goddaughter’s iPod earbuds, so it never made much of an impression on me. Until one day, when I was fast-forwarding through a performance sequence of SYTYCD, and this…this vision…flashed by in an itsy-bitsy teeny-weeny yellow micro-mini. Stopped me dead in my tracks. So, the song is dreck, yeah, but who cares? I’ve listened to it (or more accurately, watched it performed with my tongue on the floor) about a hundred times now because, to coin a phrase, Katy Perry could sing the phone book looking like that (and probably should). What she lacks in talent she more than makes up in eye candy.

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